9/11

Today is the 7th anniversary of the tragic events of 9/11. Each year I struggle with how to commemorate (not sure is that's the right word) this horrific occasion. Even now, I can't find the words.

A few days ago, I stumbled onto this web site: http://wordle.net/ You type in a bunch of words and it makes art from it. I wish I could make it bigger so you can see all of it, but you get the idea. I find it really interesting that the software chose the words Please, Go, Crash, and Crying to highlight ~ those are the words that my heart cries out when I think of 9/11... PLEASE, don't go back inside... GO, and get as far away as you can... CRASH, the deafening sound as the towers fell... CRYING, which was on the face of every person on TV that day. That week. That month.

Hmmm.. I just noticed that NEW is pretty big, too. NEW York, NEW Jersey. NEW memorial. NEW starts, whether you wanted one of not. I am in awe of the signs.

That day, I was at my office in Hunt Valley, MD, working for MCI, back when MCI was a fun company. The phone rang and it was my friend, Carol, sobbing hysterically. 8:46am. It scared the shit out of me. She told me that she was watching TV, and that a plane hit one of the Twin Towers. It's important to note that my family lives only 47 miles (give or take) from the city. We can SEE the city lights from the marina where my Dad keeps his boat. I must have been in a bit of shock - I didn't really understand why she was so upset, until she asked if I had heard from my father.

My God. My father works in New York City. I can't remember if I called my mom at work, or if I dialed the house phone, but I learned that he decided not to go to work that day. He just "decided not to go." He missed a bombing in NYC several years prior, and now he missed this. Angels must be watching over him.

Shortly after the 2nd plane struck the 2nd tower, and the 3rd plane crashed into the Pentagon. Corporate closed MCI. We NEVER closed. It scared me. We had no TV in the office so I didn't SEE it. I don't think that I really understood the magnitude.

I drove home to get the dogs, and then headed to Chip's sister's house to stay with his family. Chip, at the time, was headed home from work, and had to turn around and go back to the DC area, "just in case." When I arrived, I plopped down in front of the TV for the first time. It may have been close to 12:00 by then. By that time, the 4th plane had crashed in a field in PA.

There are no words for what I saw - people jumping from buildings trying to escape a fiery death. The dazed expressions, the frantic phone calls from the plane explaining what was happening and offering last moments of "I love yous.'

I remember the 1st anniversary of 9/11. I must not have been thinking straight, but I was in K-MART for some reason. All of the TV sets in the store were turned on, and the names of the dead were read by friends and family members, many of them children's voices remembering their mothers, or fathers, or both. Over 6,000 dead.

I'm taking a moment to remember this "Patriot's Day." Rather than the red, white & blue, I wore black. It's more fitting.

Thank you, Dad, again, for playing hookie. I love you.